Sunday, March 11, 2007

Two Halves Make a ... Hole?


In Germany, a man in the throes of divorce decided to divide the assets of his marriage out of court. He measured his conjugal home carefully before chain sawing through the wooden roof and wall, then removed his half with a forklift truck, thereby proving that a house divided cannot stand.

He is a mason by trade, a husband by default.

"The man said he was just taking his due," said a police spokesman. "But I don't think his wife was too pleased."

I wonder if they had children.

17 comments:

MsLittlePea said...

Heehee! Wonder if the wife ever had an urge to chainsaw anything in half...

mist1 said...

I checked your facts on this one. It seems like mom gets the kids torsos during the week, while dad has the lower extremities. Then, the torsos go stay with dad on the weekends and mom gets the legs and stuff. They didn't explain what they do for holidays.

It's always the children that have to suffer in a broken home, isn't it?

heartinsanfrancisco said...

Ms. Pea,

I'll bet she does now.

Mist,

I'm so glad we cleared that up. Thanks for checking.

Thailand Gal said...

(rolling eyes) Oh, geez! What an idiot! Sorry.. that was my first reaction to the guy.

Man!

LOL


Peace,

~Chani

heartinsanfrancisco said...

Chani,

This will surely make the annals of Creative Divorce.

Or maybe he will get a job with the Demolition Derby.

meno said...

Gee. I wonder why they are getting divorced?

Lone Grey Squirrel said...

But who gets the toilet?

heartinsanfrancisco said...

Meno,

Gee. I wonder, too.

Squirrel,

Maybe he cut it in half, too.

Is your bowl half empty or half full?

Pickled Olives said...

Lord I hope he didn't procreate.

Open Grove Claudia said...

I loved this story. It's so beautifully depicts the experience of divorce.

furiousBall said...

Yet another reason why I'm glad my wife and I reconciled and didn't get divorced.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

Olives,

That would be too much to hope for. Look around you.

Claudia,

I guess what God hath joined together didn't include the house.

Furious,

It saves a lot of wear and tear on the ole chainsaw.

goodthomas said...

I love your cartoon at the end, and I love the magicians face.

Beautiful.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

Thomas,

She's probably his wife.

The Law Fairy said...

Geez, how rude.

Doesn't he know the common rule of etiquette that, when dividing a thing in half, the person who cut the thing lets the other person choose which half she wants?

velvet girl said...

Boy, that's funny in a sort of tragic way. I feel guilty laughing, yet not.

-velvet

heartinsanfrancisco said...

Law Fairy,

The cad. He probably took the good half without even asking her which one she wanted.

Velvet,

We are a most bizarre species for sure.