Short People Got No Reason to Live

"There's a Psychic Faire in Golden Gate Park today," I told Flip.

"Did that just come to you?" he asked.

It was pouring. We decided to go downtown instead as he had an underwear errand at Gap.

I won't shop at Gap because I am a logical person while they persist in hanging their smallest sizes on the highest racks where small people can't reach.

How can this be working for them? Do they sit in their giant board rooms and wonder why the Extra-Small and Small garments never sell? Except for anorexic supermodels who are eight feet tall and weigh 63 pounds, chances are that most people who wear the smallest sizes are short. Our little arms don't reach that high and frankly, the merchandise is not worth the neck and back pain which ensues from stretching way over our little heads.

Does Randy Newman own Gap?

I stopped to marvel at a new perfume called Séxual ( In giant letters) by Michel Germain at Bloomingdale's.

Now that's telling it like it is. No beating around the bush or clever euphemisms. Subtlety is dead.

I was afraid to smell it, but I wonder if there's a blue collar version called "Hump" at K-Mart.

Flip tried to sneak a skateboard by me the way he does Fritos and chips at the supermarket. He gravitates toward the phenomenally unhealthy and dangerous while I fervently believe in health food stores and am only a danger to myself in that I am phenomenally careless.

I'm all for the skateboard, unlike the junk food, but the weather we've had lately is more conducive to ark building. It seems like a purchase that could wait until spring. Our closets are already full of boogie boards and guitar cases, and not nearly full enough with the aforementioned Extra-Small clothing items.

There is a ¡PARTY! next door with the horrible stench of deep-fried silage that earned us a visit from the fire department the last time Skankblossom cooked, and of course, wall-to-wall noise. There are about 20 pairs of shoes in the hall while the trollop of the manse prances about in those surgically attached stilettos. And me without a semi-automatic submachine gun.

Who frickin' gives a party in a small apartment?

On a brighter note, Ian at Or So I Thought gave me a "Roar for Powerful Words" award. I like lions (and tigers and bears, oh my.)

Thank you, Ian.

I would like to give it to Lex at On Second Thought for her turbo-charged honesty. She pulls no punches even on herself, is committed to her own growth and questions everything.

Chani at Thailand Gal serves as a spiritual due-North for many of us. She is eloquent, passionate about her beliefs and always kind.

Liz at Los Angelista's Guide to the Pursuit of Happiness is all heart, a beautiful writer, skilled observer of humankind, and deliciously quirky.

David at Witnessing Am I is All Writer, All the Time. He doesn't just use words, he owns them. He excels in noticing the small things that make up a life and recreating them beautifully.

Mariposa at Mariposa's Tales has honored me with a "Wonderful Women of the Web" award.

Thank you, Mariposa. We haven't known each other for long, but you and your delightful blog have brightened my world so much and quickly become a necessary part of my day.

Claudia at On a Limb with Claudia is exactly my idea of a wonderful woman of the world. She is both spiritual and vastly cool, a combination that is not easy to pull off. She writes wondrously, is a supremely independent thinker, and a most joyful, funny person.

Red Mojo at Half a Bubble Off has further honored me with a "You Make My Day" award.

You have also quickly become a friend and I so admire your heart, humor and courage. Thank you for thinking of me.

I cannot choose.

You all make my day, every day, and my life is richer for reading about your lives and your thoughts. I love the community we have established in which everyone is equally important and we all try to support and care about each other.

I honor each and every one of you because you make my day (and my night) simply better.

Thank you!